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All Right Now, This Is Just Embarrassing

22 comments

We're one week into Kilted to Kick Cancer 2012, and the man I vanquished last year, Jay G. of the MArooned blog, is beating me handily this time around.

To the tune of $1,050 dollars raised to $70 raised, to be exact.

Now, I'm not gonna hector y'all for money. But I would like to score better than 70 freakin' dollars. Roughly 1,000 people visit this blog every day, on average. If only 20 of those 1,000 readers donated $20 each day, by the end of the month we'd run away with this thing, and no reader would have to donate more than once.

That's not too much to ask, is it?

I'd like to emphasize again that I get nothing from this. Every cent of your tax-deductible donations goes straight to the charity. Kilted to Kick Cancer gets nothing but the pride of knowing we raised the money. None of the organizers of this campaign – Happy Medic, MotorCop nor myself – is paid, nor are we eligible for the prize packages.

I have beaten the bushes, called in favors from friends, begged, borrowed and mined every contact I have in the gun-blogging community (Unfortunately, my EMS contacts donated nothing. Ain't that a kick in the pants?) to procure prize packages for this fundraising campaign. And a pretty sweet set of prizes they are, too. Each prize packages includes well over $1,000 in guns and gear, all donated by generous businesses eager to help our cause.

The top three fundraisers in this campaign are going to get their pick of these prizes, and right now it looks like Jay G. is going to get first dibs. Two other dedicated fundraisers are going to get the remaining prize packages, and more power to 'em.

But dammit, I sure would like the bragging rights that my readers donated more money than anyone else, whether I'm eligible for a prize package or not.

So here's what I'd like you to do. Go to the Kilted Team page for the Prostate Cancer Foundation or for LiveStrong. Check out the standings, and if I'm not the top fundraiser, kick in $20 to my campaign. You only have to donate once. If you've donated already and would like to do so again, well I'm certainly not going to complain.

But $20 is all I ask.

I've got a few thousand regular readers. Roughly 1,000 of you visit the blog every day. I figure if even half of my regular readers donated $20, we could raise $40k all by ourselves.

So what do I have to do to entice you to donate that $20 to charity?

Humiliate and debase myself? I'll do it. Check out the photo of me in drag over on my left sidebar as proof of that. I have no shame. Pick your embarrassing act, but donate first.

Beg and whine? Crap, I'm already doing that.

Write a blog post on your favorite subject? Well heck, that's easy. Pick a subject.

Want me to pimp your blog or business? Heck, I'll snap a kilted picture of myself in public, holding a white board with your business name or blog address on it, if you'll just donate.

Would cute pictures of my kid help? I can do that.

I'll pretty much do whatever it takes to get your donations. Just name it.

And while you're donating, if you're possessor of a Y chromosome and over age 40, get checked!

 

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Posted by on September 8, 2012 • Filed under: Charity, Kilted to Kick Cancer
  • http://twitter.com/1U801TheWebcast 1-U-801 The Webcast

    You’ve got me beat by $69, Kelly

  • Ross

    OK, Kelly… how much would it take for you to pose wearing your kilt… and a red shirt, complete with proper insignia (a la Star Trek TOS)?

  • Ambulance_Driver

    Let me find a redshirt, Ross. I’ll get back to you. ;)

  • Matt

    Make sure it’s a red shirt with a big target on the back!

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  • Jay G.

    See, that’s the thing. You’re out for bragging rights. I’m out for revenge… :)

  • Jen

    One year ago, August, you talked me through the most horrible experience of my life to date. Remember “To Jen”? That’s me. I reread your post several times a day for two weeks. I had to drive by that spot every day for the next eight months. But thanks to you, I still have three Xanax in the bottle. You did so much for me with your words. So now I want to do something for you AND for KTKC.

    You asked what you had to do to get donations. Here’s a challenge for you. As a loyal reader, I remember when you were on a major diet kick not so long ago. You were doing great, but then the updates stopped… Prostate cancer is not the only disease that kills men. Heart disease and other issues assocated with… um… excess girth… are also bad news. So here you go: I will donate one dollar for every pound you lose between now and the last day of September. For every five pounds, tack on an extra five bucks. So five pounds equals $10. Seven pounds equals $10. Ten pounds equals $20. Fifteen equals $30. And so on. I’ll go up to $100. You get healthier, KTKC gets money, everybody wins. Bet some of your other loyal readers would get behind this too. We love you and want you around as long as possible.

    You made a difference for me that went beyond your bolance. Let’s do this together.

    XXOXOXO,

    Jen

  • C

    Jen, I’ll match that! Thank you so much for your comment and its’ substance – you sound like an amazing person and I’m glad you’re out there :-)

    For as much as I appreciate your spirit, though, if AD loses fifty pounds in 20 days I’m pretty sure he’ll die of cardiac complications related to dehydration – there’s no way other than amputation to lose that much tissue in so little time. How about instead we do, say, $50 each if he’ll pledge to drop that by next September 1st?
    How ’bout it sir? I’ll go the $50 and match your 50 lbs…
    C

  • Paxillated

    Okay, my $20 has been Paypal’d. This old lady done squeezed it out of my disability pension for you – and for my hubby’s prostate. So the rest of you, get on the ball!

    Re: diets. I hate them. I’ve lost 40 lbs on one of the healthiest ones – and gained 50 back. I hate obsessing over every molecule I eat. I hate exercise programs. And, I’m a big comfort eater, and they take away my comfort foods. But, at 340 lbs (5’8″ female) I really needed (still do) to lose weight.
    So I came up with a very simple plan. “They” always say, diet and exercise, diet and exercise; here’s my take. Eat less, move more. That’s it. I haven’t changed what I eat or what I do. I just fill my plate, then put some back. When I’m vegging out on my computer, instead of saving up errands, I get up and get more coffee, bring it back, take my plate to the kitchen – see what I mean? simple stuff. And in a year and a half, I’ve lost 70 lbs.
    No feeling deprived. No “3 oz. of lean meat.” (I hate lean meat.) Just eating 4 slices of bacon instead of five. (I started with 9 instead of 10.) No stinkin’ scale (I weigh at the doctor’s office).
    Yes, my bad cholesterol is a bit high. But my back hurts less, and there’s one less X on my clothing labels. And my CC waistpack is a little easier to reach…

  • Ambulance_Driver

    Tell ya what I’ll do.

    I restart the weight loss efforts today. I’d been meaning to, but now is as good a time as any.

    I’ll lose weight, and you match Jen’s donations as of September 30.

    If I’m 100 pounds down by NEXT September 1, you each kick off KTKC 2013 with a $100 donation.

    Deal?

  • Ambulance_Driver

    Thank you for your donation!

  • Jen

    You are right, c. Was not thinking too clearly last night when I posted that – long day of football watching!! But my proposal, in theory, is sound, and I will still donate $100 for measurable weight loss by a set date, both numbers TBD. I’ll let AD set the goal he is most comfortable with, and I will encourage other readers to join in. :-)

  • Ambulance_Driver

    Jen, check out my reply to C, and see if that’s agreeable to you both.

  • Jen

    Deal. A dollar a pound for now, five extra for every five. $100 in 2013 (I have faith in you!!)

    Please post this separately, because I know lots of others would probably match this too.

    Thanks, AD. Good luck!!!!

  • Shannon

    You’re asking underpaid ambulance personnel to donate? The ones who can barely pay for their families on their wages? And not just asking, but making it out like they’re bad for not helping? Excuse me, that is completely uncalled for and you should be ashamed of yourself, actually. You are doing this for a great cause, and I commend you for that. But to try to sit there and berate EMS personnel like because they help people, they should be obligated to donate to YOUR cause?

    These brave men and women barely make ends meet as is. And now you have to sit there and imply they’re bad for not doing so? Shame on you. Shame on you for tainting the good word and actions of your cause by putting other people down. EMS put so much of their time and life, they donate extra hours to help the public, to go the extra mile and donate to local causes. And you’re going to sit there and degrade them for not donating to this specific thing? You don’t know what those people are making donations to. You don’t know their personal sacrifices, even if you’re also in the EMS field. You don’t know their situation, or what they’re doing. It’s a shame so many people look at breast cancer, and don’t focus on equally terrible cancers like testicular or prostate cancer, but that is no excuse to sit there and badmouth your friends, or other EMS, for not donating to one specific cause. No one is an endless supply of money that can donate to every single charity that needs it. Especially not underpaid EMS workers.

  • Ambulance_Driver

    Shannon, I’m asking my readers to donate, many of which are not underpaid EMS personnel.

    And I am ASKING, not berating, Nor am I badmouthing anyone. If you feel berated, I can’t help much change your perceptions. Seems to me like you’re looking for a reasons to feel offended, and found one.

    And no, I’m not buying the whole “underpaid EMT barely makes my rent don’t ask me to take food out of my kid’s mouths to donate to your cause” argument, either.

    I’m donating MY time here, too, sister – time away from the writing I use to supplement MY meager income, time away from my hobbies, time away from my daughter, and everything I get nothing out of this.

    If you can’t afford to donate, DON’T DONATE. No one is holding a gun to your head.

    But don’t come here and chide me on my blog for trying to raise money for a good cause. All I am doing is issuing a challenge to my readers, period. Take up the challenge, or don’t, as your conscience dictates.

    Just so you know, you’re going to see these posts for the next 21 days. If you don’t like them, then don’t read my blog.

    Have a nice day.

  • D Hawkins

    I’m a VOLUNTEER EMT and make diddly squat. I’m a student on top of that, and as soon as i get my check I’ll pay $20 via paypal. We all have hearts, regardless of our pay wage. My grandfather suffered through this, and anything to help out anyone through this.

  • Nuala Wolfe

    Hey there Kelly….if this is going to be going on for awhile, I can toss something in on friday the 14th!

  • Ambulance_Driver

    It’s going on at least through September 30, Nuala. Thank you do much for your support!

  • C

    Deal! I put $50 down to inspire you :-)

  • Paxillated

    Shannon, Kelly’s not pressuring anyone, and I don’t think he’d ever ask anyone to give beyond their means. And I certainly don’t “hear” him degrading anyone. (I tend to add “tone of voice” to whatever I read.) I’ve read his words long enough to tell when he’s being drop-dead serious, and when he’s not.

    I donated $20 because I wanted to. I don’t have a lot of spare money, but when he said, “If only 20 of those 1,000 readers donated $20 each day, by the end of the month we’d run away with this thing”, I wanted to be part of that. I can still afford to eat & pay my bills, don’t worry!

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