Parental Advisory* Lyrics

Of all the songs on my iPhone, there's a select few that always make KatyBeth channel Tipper Gore.

Whenever I play Cee Lo Green's "F*ck You," or Pink's "F*ckin' Perfect," she will gasp in horror, blush like a tomato, and clap her hands over her ears until the song is over, whereupon she admonishes me for listening to such trash.

Ooooohh boy, am I gonna have fun reminding her of that in a few years…

*Warning: Contains explicit language. Children, don't let your parents listen to these songs, or surely they will experiment with drugs and post-marital sex, turn to a life of crime and spiral into a vortex of despair. PTA meetings will devolve into drunken, drug-fueled orgies, and the little old ladies who greet you at Wal Mart will have their hair dyed in one blue stripe down the middle, instead of all over. It'll be anarchy, ANARCHY I tell you!

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Posted by Ambulance Driver on May 10, 2012 • Filed under: KatyBeth

badyogi

Kelly, whatever you do, don’t let her watch Pink’s performance of “Glitter in the Air”.

Of course, you should watch it multiple times….
Old_NFO

LOL, yep payback is gonna be fun!
Jeff

My 9 and 10 year old boys in the back of the minivan…

“Roll one, smoke one, and we all just having funSo we just, roll one, smoke one
When you live like this you’re supposed to party…”
Guffaw

My daughter (at age 11) watched JFK with me. I expected deep questions about conspiracy theories. What I got was:
“That Joe Pesci’s got a mouth on him!”
Gerry N.

When my baby girl, now 38, was abour four she and I were waiting in the car for her mother to get something from the store. She started to get really fidgety and began throwing a fit. I got mad and asked her what in all that was holy was her problem. Her answer, at the top of her lungs: “I HAVEN’T GOT A F*CKIN’ THING TO DO! Four years old, fer cryin’ out loud.
RosalindJ

And when they’re in school, we have to discipline them for playing that garbage for other children and/or reciting the lyrics (complete with moves) and explain why it isn’t acceptable, despite mommy and daddy glamorizing it by example.

AD, love you. This is the only time I’ve read your work that’s left me cold. You’re a great dad. No one is perfect, but please..if your DD is embarrassed, I think she’s telling you something. Treasure the few years left with non-obscenity laden actual music.
Ambulance_Driver

Rosalind, my grandparents hated Elvis and thought he was a bad influence, perhaps yours did too.
I strongly suspect that Steven Foster’s parents were mortified 150 years ago that “Camptown Races” was about gambling.
I think disapproving of your child’s taste in music/movies/video games has been part of the parental condition for ages, and is no more likely to turn them into amoral little hoodlums than it did you or I.
I give KatyBeth enough credit to know that she is not Cee Lo Green, and that if she ever said, “F*ck you,” to anyone, prior to her entry into adulthood when she can choose to talk like that or not (and honestly, when some people need to be told that very thing), there would be serious consequences to her actions.
She sees unsafe gunplay in movies, too, but she knows better than to try such things at the range.
Kelly Grayson
mpatk

They learn that behavior at school (here in CA at least). I’ll never forget the shocked and accusatory reaction my kids had the first time they realized that Daddy’s beer had *alcohol* in it.

Now, my son is a teenager and uses the shocked tone of voice sarcastically, the little smart-ass.