Verbatim Patient Report From Tonight:

9 comments

Ambulance Driver: "Heya, Mercy General. This is AD on Borg Cube 387, 5 minutes out with Patient X, who is apparently suffering from, well… let's call it acute exacerbation of chronic Patient X-ness."

ED Nurse (sighing): "So she's drunk and fighting with her boyfriend again? What is it this time, abdominal pain or demonic possession?"

AD: "Not really sure, haven't determined if I'm talking to Patient X or the demon."

ED Nurse: "Straight to triage upon arrival, AD."

AD: "Roger that, straight to triage for exorcism via fluorescent light therapy. See you in five."

Tweet This Post

Posted by Ambulance Driver on July 19, 2011 • Filed under: Frequent Fliers, Humor

Anonymous

And ANOTHER winnah for AD… Man, you just can’t catch a break down there can you???
Nicoledog01

As much as that should be sad, it is totally funny!!
http://theholstersite.com Evyl Robot Michael

Nice!
http://firefighterparamedicstories.blogspot.com/ FireMedic

Awesome! Been there, done that….maybe not quite that good, but still…
mrmacs

Such terrible radio discipline, you should be ashamed of yourself…

Like when Fire Board asked if I was at the hospital yet (five minutes out, routine priority, no blinkey-blinkey, no woo-woo), and I stated that I was evaluating all of the traffic lights en route to ensure that they properly turned red when I approached.
Anonymous

I’d never say that over the radio, especially using a patient’s name.

We do all of our hospital communication by cell phone.

Ambulance Driver

________________________________
mrmacs

Bad call on my part. I was trying to make a joke, came out the wrong way. Delete if you wouldn’t mind?

We have to use radio here for call-in. No issued cell phones, etc. Ask TrommaShere.In the meantime, I’ve opened mandible, inserted distal phlanges and am masticating vigorously…
Anonymous

No worries, brother. I’m much harder to offend than that.

Ambulance Driver

________________________________
mrmacs

Thanks for understanding my mis-understanding.