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Submitted myself to the tender ministrations of the TSA drones this morning, en route to Boston for a few days of shooting and swapping lies with my Northeast gun blogger cronies before we head to EMS Today in Baltimore.
Hopefully, pics from tonight’s dinner to follow!
If you’ve ever met me in person, then you know that I am, well… portly. The less-charitably inclined, including myself, would say that I am corpulent, wheezing bag of fatassitude.
Despite that, I am generally healthy. My HDL, LDL, total cholesterol and triglycerides would be the envy of any man. My blood sugar is well within normal ranges, my BP runs around 120/80 most days, and my resting heart rate runs in the mid-70′s. I generally don’t winded easily, unless I’m tying my shoes and my big, fat gut impairs expansion of my diaphragm.
I can still do my share of lifting, and for a big guy, I can move pretty quickly.
Still, I am not without health problems. I have meralgia paresthetica, a chronic pain in my left upper leg, caused by my Cinderella belly* pressing on my left lateral cutaneous nerve. It makes it rather painful to wear pants, and especially a belt. But, since I can’t fully adopt the Robb Allen Pants-Free Lifestyle™, I must soldier on.
I’ve had creaky knees since I was diagnosed with Osgood-Schlatter disease in high school, and the pain has been there in various degrees of severity ever since. Mostly, pain is just part of the landscape now, but I notice it when I get up and down from the floor, and my weight ain’t doing those creaky knees any favors.
My current blood pressure is considered normal, but if I drop to well below 300, my BP runs around 100/60, and my resting heart rate runs in the mid-40′s. Plus, my cardiovascular recovery after strenuous exercise decreases from “Somebody please shoot me!” to “Hey baby, wanna go again?”
Regular readers of my blog also know that I went on a successful weight-loss campaign three years ago this month. I lost 84 pounds between February 4 and June 25, 2008, and didn’t have to resort to fad diets or surgery to do it. I simply expended more calories than I consumed, and when I wanted to indulge every now and then, I made sure to expend more calories that week.
Unfortunately, the move back to an ambulance on night shifts, coupled with the bike wreck that left me unable to do anything other than walk (gingerly) for a couple of months, all conspired to knock me off the healthy eating wagon. January 31, I stepped on the scale at the hospital, and was horrified to see that I was back up to 360.2 pounds.
That’s only two pounds short of the heaviest I’ve ever been.
I gained back 82 of the 84 pounds I had lost, in a little over two years.
I vowed then to change my disgusting dietary habits and start exercising, and thus far I’ve dropped 21 pounds since February 1. That’s the really shameful part about it; I have no problem losing weight. My tastes are simple, and I’m just as happy eating a foil pack of tuna and an apple as I am wolfing down a Taco Bell Heart Attack In A Sack™. All it takes is the willpower to do something about it.
So starting today, the weight loss ticker goes back up on the sidebar of my blog, and I’ll post updates on my progress every Friday. My goal is to be below 250 pounds by the Texas EMS Conference in November. That’s over 110 pounds in 8½ months. That’s a lofty goal, but I’ve proven I can lose the weight if I try. Now the task is sustaining good habits, and making it a lifestyle.
Hopefully, I can eventually go from this…
… back to this:
Yeah, I know it looks like I’m about 17 years old and 165 pounds there, but I’m deceptive like that.
While I’m at it, any of you other JEMS Fire/EMS bloggers want to join me in a weight-loss challenge? Yeah, I’m looking at you, Mike Ward and John Mitchell…
* So called because it turns back to penis at midnight, despite the scurrilous lies told by my ex-wife. See also tool shed, hops and barley retention, and solar panel for the sex machine.
Mark Glencorse is hanging up the keyboard.
You’re a credit to the profession, Mark, and the way you ended your blogging career is every bit as graceful and classy as the way you conducted it.
You will be missed.
I know the fire service EMS contingent is going to flame me for this, but I always thought EMS had more in common with law enforcement than the fire service.
OLD SAYBROOK – Police Chief Michael Spera would be facing a nearly $30,000 bill for overtime costs in the next few weeks but for officers’ generosity.
Almost every officer is training to become a certified emergency medical technician by taking 90 hours of classes for about two months after their shifts and on days off, without overtime pay.
Those who aren’t participating are already certified.
Think about it; high mobility rather than fixed locations, some degree of personal autonomy within the rank structure, strong communications and interpersonal skills, creative problem solving…
… all these things are part and parcel of EMS, and they seem to describe law enforcement far better than they do fireground operations. Even an interrogation and gathering patient history have a great deal in common.
Combined law enforcement/EMS isn’t a very common system model, but it is done in other places. Gretna, LA has had a dual role law enforcement/EMS system for many years, and I’m sure there are others.
Try as I might, the only negative thing I can say about this idea is that, at only 90 hours, their EMT training is only about half as long as it should be. The 1993 National Standard Curriculum for EMT-B was a minimum of 110 hours, and most schools did more than that. I doubt that implementation of the new National EMS Educational Standards would make the course shorter.
So what say you, readers? Does a law enforcement/EMS model make sense?
… Episode 36 is up on Confessions of an EMS Newbie.
Ron and I discuss the philosophical question, which kills you quicker, the arterial bleed or the compromised airway? We answer a few listener questions, discuss PASG, and offer a few non-traditional uses for the KED.
It’s Confessions of an EMS Newbie, the only podcast known to cure cooties. Get your booster shot now!
I know that in the current economic climate, people have enough problems paying for their own rent, food and medical care. But we here in the United States still have it pretty sweet.
You could, for example, live in Haiti.
And in the best tradition of putting your money where your mouth is, two paramedic friends are going on a medical mission to Haiti. They’re volunteering their time and skills, but their altruism doesn’t buy them airfare, nor does it pay for medical supplies for their mission.
If you have any to spare, could you please consider donating to their cause, however small a donation it might be?
If you’re also a blogger, would you consider spreading the word on your own blogs, Facebook and Twitter? I’m sure Kaci and Rob would appreciate it, as would the people they’re trying to help.
… I’ll be speaking at the 15th Annual Connecticut EMS Conference in Cromwell on March 18-19.
Look me up, and I’ll sign your book, share an adult beverage, or just swap lies with you while I’m there!
I leave Sunday for EMS Today. The conference itself doesn’t begin until March 1, but I’ll be heading to Boston for a couple of days prior to hang out with the Northeast Gunblogger tribe and get some shooting and storytelling in.
While at EMS Today, I’ll be attending sessions, schmoozing at The Meetup, helping man the National EMS Museum Foundation booth, and possibly horning in on a few podcasts. Look me up while you’re there!
What is a preceptor, exactly?
Of the various definitions found in the dictionary, the one most applicable to us would be, “an expert or specialist, such as a physician, who gives practical experience and training to a student, especially of medicine or nursing.”
That definition fits as well as any, I suppose, but the role of a preceptor cannot be distilled into a one-sentence definition. Much like the Supreme Court’s opinion on pornography, it’s hard to describe, but we know it when we see it.
When a preceptor passes on that “practical experience and training,” there are volumes of tradition, science, art, wisdom and bullshit encompassed in those four little words. The good preceptor passes on the collective wisdom – and sometimes, inadvertently, the bullshit – of our profession to the next generation, and I mean all of it; what EMS was, what EMS is, and what EMS should be.
I’d say “what EMS will be,” but so much of that depends upon how well that preceptor does his job.
If you want to know what a preceptor really does, you have to go back to the root word:
Precept: [pree-sept] -noun
1. a commandment or direction given as a rule of action or conduct.2. an injunction as to moral conduct; maxim.3. a procedural directive or rule, as for the performance of some technical operation.4. a law.
All four definitions are important. All four have direct bearing on our practice as EMTs. They encompass our traditions, our attitudes, and our expectations of proper behavior. They are our professional ethos. The role of the preceptor is to be a steward of our profession, and in so doing, prepare the next generation of EMT’s to be stewards of the profession as well.
So why is it that many preceptors only pay attention to #3?
I suppose it’s only natural that, in a profession dominated by action-oriented, Type A personalities, that many of us feel uncomfortable teaching, for lack of a better word, the “soft skills.” As a long-time member of Louisiana’s training cadre for new EMS instructor candidates, I saw this firsthand.
The vast majority of new EMS instructors feel most comfortable teaching only in the psychomotor domain.
A few gregarious, creative types find themselves well-suited for teaching in the cognitive domain. A few more of the psychomotor types, after gaining confidence in their knowledge and skill set, add the cognitive domain to their repertoire.
But damned few, if any, have any clue how to teach the material most vital to preceptors: the affective domain.
EMT instructors can teach the knowledge and skills, but the preceptor instills the attitude, and we all know that, of all the traits necessary for success in a given profession, a positive attitude is one of the most important.
This is not a failing unique to EMS instructors and preceptors. Academics in all disciplines struggle with teaching attitudes and behavior, and few succeed at it. Those that do are easy to spot. Chances are, you’ve seen them yourself. If you think back on all the teachers you’ve had in your life, I’ll bet you could pick out one or two that had the most positive influence.
In your moments of greatest stress and indecision, whose advice do you crave? Who do you first think of when you want to share the elation of a professional triumph? When you feel beaten and discouraged, whose voice whispers your mental pep talk? Who plants the metaphorical foot in your ass when you need the motivation?
Right now, you’re probably smiling, thinking of just such a person.
Your mentor.
When it comes right down to it, any idiot can earn an EMT card. But there is a big difference between holding a card, and being an EMT. Regulatory agencies and all-too-many EMS systems don’t recognize the difference, but your patients and fellow providers do. Unfortunately, the patients usually only encounter us once. If the crew they encounter is a pair of card holders instead of real EMT’s, guess who is now the representative sample of your profession in that patient’s eyes?
So what was it that helped your mentor mold you from a mere card-holder into an EMT? What magic did they possess, and how might you learn that magic when your turn comes to be a steward of our profession?
Luckily, by learning a few simple principles - precepts, if you will – of mentoring, you can develop your own technique in molding a card-holder into an EMT. Like watching Penn Gillette explain one of his tricks, you realize it wasn’t really magic after all. The real magic is in how skillfully those techniques are applied:
Be the EMT you expect them to be.
The first rule of teaching in the affective domain is simply to model the proper behavior. Be an example.
Be exemplary.
It’s harder than it sounds. We all have days when we aren’t at our best, when fatigue and frustration whisper in your ear that it really isn’t that important to come to work with your boots shined and your pants pressed. But when you feel it necessary to counsel your trainee that patients don’t trust a paramedic who looks like a friggin’ hobo, it really boosts your credibility not to look like one yourself.
“Do as I say, not as I do,” only works with toddlers, and it doesn’t work that well on them, either. It’s a parent’s way of saying, “My attitude isn’t as important as your obedience,” and don’t think for a second that the toddler – and your trainee – won’t eventually be perceptive enough to make the translation.
Likewise, your attitude toward others is going to have some effect on your trainee. Either they’ll adopt it – wrong or right – or they’ll spot it for the bad attitude it is, and vow never to treat others the way you do.
Congratulations, you’ve become an example. A bad one. Instead of a mentor, you’ve become a cautionary tale.
Every experienced medic has a hundred nursing home horror stories, and most are willing to regale you with them at the drop of a hat. Within each of those stories is a kernel of truth, that nursing home care does leave a lot to be desired, and that’s what makes them so toxic.
It’s easy to belittle a nursing home nurse, because you’ve heard the clueless reports, and you’ve seen the shoddy care with your own eyes. You’ve smelled the aroma of poop, urine and bleach that permeates the halls.
What’s harder is respecting them for the job they do, and how hard it is. Until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes, you might want to rein in the condescension a bit, and teach your trainee instead how to assess and treat his patient under challenging circumstances, with very little information to go on.
You know, like we do every single day outside the nursing home, without bitching and belittling the people who called 911.
And on those days when you aren’t at your best, man up (or woman, as the case may be) and admit it. No one expects their mentor to be perfect, but they should be worthy of respect. Earning that respect means being willing to admit when you’re wrong.
Which reminds me: Hey, Peter Griffin? Next long distance transport is on me, man. Or one Genevieve transport, whichever.
Teach more, evaluate less.
I notice an interesting phenomenon among some of my preceptor colleagues. Some of the most talented medics I know, people who will tirelessly coach, critique and encourage a paramedic student, shift gears into Evaluation Mode whenever they’re precepting a newly certified paramedic. It’s as if they expect the new medic to prove his mettle, the attitude almost, “Show me what ya got, kid.”
The question is, what have they got? What have they proven, other than the ability to successfully negotiate a standardized test designed to weed the minimally competent from the outright dangerous? What do they know this week that they didn’t know last week?
Formal education can give a student the pieces to the patient care puzzle, but it takes a talented preceptor to show them how to put it together. What the new EMT-Basic has taken from the sum total of their classroom and clinical education is a set of instructions along the lines of, “Draw a square, with a triangle on top. Now, in the big square, draw two smaller squares, and a rectangle. On the rectangle, draw a little circle.”
A preceptor translates those instructions into, “Draw me a house.”
None of the shapes change. The skill set is no different. The artist doesn’t need you to draw it for him. He only needs you, his muse mentor, to show him what the picture is supposed to look like.
What he doesn’t need is for his mentor to systematically deconstruct everything he learned in the classroom. None of this, “Well, that may work in the classroom, but this is the way it works on the street,” bullshit. You’re supposed to provide confidence and clarity, not contradiction and character assassination.
The picture isn’t any clearer when the trainee is a newly minted paramedic. Bryan Bledsoe delivered a lecture once on critical thinking, and in it, there was one slide defining the levels of practitioners that really stood out:
Novice practitioner:
*Rigid adherence to taught rules or plans*Little situational perception (symptom management only)*No discretionary judgmentCompetent practitioner:*Able to cope with pressure*Sees actions partly in terms of long-term goals and broader conceptual framework(disease management)*Follows standardized and routine proceduresExpert practitioner:*No longer relies on rules, guidelines or maxims*Intuitive grasp of situations*Uses analytic approaches only in novel situations or when problems occur
One might think that paramedic school is what changes a novice practitioner like an EMT-B into an expert, but is that really the case? Does paramedic school actually teach you to think critically, or does it just produce another novice practitioner with a broader skill set?
Actually, rather than teach critical thinking skills, most formal EMS educational programs do just the opposite.
They systematically – either by accident or by design – suppress any innate critical thinking skills the student may have had. What emerges is a practitioner who has faithfully memorized the ACLS algorithms, can recall drug dosages, indications and contraindications at will, and can recite system protocols verbatim. They learn to pass a multiple choice exam, when real life is more on the order of an essay question. They’ve memorized all the rules.
What they don’t know, is how to apply them, or more importantly, when they shouldn’t. Teaching that sort of nuanced thinking is the role of the preceptor. It’s your job to turn them from novices into experts, or at the least, competent practitioners.
More teaching, less evaluating.
Know your trainee.
Past street experience can be both blessing and curse for both the trainee and the preceptor.
Experience is hard to quantify, and the plain truth is, not all experience is good. Every EMT filters a patient presentation through a prism of his past experiences. If they’ve been good experiences, that prism can refract a muddy clinical presentation into a clear diagnostic picture.
If they’ve been bad experiences, well… even the clearest set of symptoms can be hopelessly distorted when seen through the eyes of a trainee who has learned all the wrong things on the street.
When I trained retrievers for a living, I described it as a mental photo album. When your retriever steps to the line in a field trial or duck blind, he’s flipping through a mental photo album of all the past retrieves he’s catalogued, until he finds a picture that matches the scene in front of him. As a handler, it was my job to make sure my retriever was looking at the right picture. The only way to do that is to know the retriever. You have to know his personality, his mannerisms, be able to read his body language.
As a preceptor, it’s an easier task, because your trainee can talk.
And that’s what they should do; talk, talk, talk, and then talk some more. Have them plan possible scenarios on the way to the call. Let them speak first in the post-call critique. Encourage them to ask questions. Let them gather most of the patient history, and only speak when you feel they’re missing something important.
The more they talk, the easier it is to learn their weaknesses and strengths, learn what motivates them, learn what they fear, learn how they process their thoughts. But while they’re talking, keep one thing in mind:
Communicate clearly.
While they’re doing all that talking, don’t sit there silently like the Sphinx. Use Socratic dialogue to guide the conversation. Ask rhetorical questions that begin with “why?” or “why not?” Parse your words carefully, and allow your trainee to arrive at the conclusion on his own. Play devil’s advocate occasionally.
But never, ever just assume that your trainee understands why you do things a certain way. For you, it may be intuitively obvious, a shorthand you’ve worked out through years of experience. For your trainee, it may be incomprehensible, or even worse, wrongly ascribed to a different motivation entirely.
Case in point: My trainee and I treated an elderly patient in the nursing home who had fallen and injured her hip. By the time we had arrived, the staff had already picked her up and put her back in bed. They were busy turning her this way and that, cleaning her where she had soiled herself, changing her diaper, putting her in a fresh gown…
… and I chose not to immobilize her. Despite her medical issues, including early Alzheimer’s, she was a fairly reliable patient. She didn’t know what day it was, but she could clearly relate the circumstances of her fall, and the pain wasn’t so distracting that she couldn’t participate in her own NEXUS exam. She followed all commands appropriately, and focused clearly on my instructions.
Now, rigid adherence to our protocols would necessitate immobilizing this lady. But I’ve spent three years in this system, and I have enough experience with our medical director and the people who QA our reports to know that they are not prone to judge harshly, provided our documentation paints a clear picture of why certain steps were omitted.
To the trainee, the medical director is GOD, perhaps even an unmerciful one, and our protocols may as well be written on stone tablets.
So rather than allow my trainee to attend the patient and document the run, I took over. I had my reasons for doing this, but they weren’t clear to the trainee.
He said as much during the post-call critique, insulted that I didn’t trust him to run a simple hip fracture. Instead of replying, I simply asked him, “Why do you think I didn’t immobilize that lady?”
“Because it’d be a major pain in the ass,” he answered. “The bed was against the wall, you couldn’t get to her to log-roll her properly or hold C-spine alignment…”
Wrong.
I didn’t immobilize her because I judged that the procedure was 1) unnecessary, based on my examination, and b) likely to substantially increase my patient’s pain and discomfort, and c) perhaps even cause harmful sequelae like decubitus ulcers or respiratory decompensation.
I went on to explain to my trainee the difference between experience and expedience. Experience tells you when to omit certain things because it’s easier on your patient. Expedience means you omitted those steps because it’s easier on you, and that is never acceptable.
I also explained to him that, since I made a judgment call that differed with protocol, I chose to shield my trainee from scrutiny by handling the entire call myself.
When I document such a run, it’s an experienced medic using his clinical judgment. Were he the one to submit the electronic report, he’d be seen as a raw rookie making a mistake. Even now, when my judgment is sometimes questioned, I have the knowledge and experience to defend my decisions. My trainee has less ammunition.
View mistakes as teachable moments.
It is human nature to learn more from our mistakes than our successes. As the saying goes, “good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.”
It’s the preceptor’s job to transform those mistakes into learning opportunities, while still ensuring good patient care. Some mistakes -the ones that negatively impact patient care or reinforce bad habits – must be corrected immediately, while others can be identified in the post-call critique. Simply by asking, “What would you have done differently?”you’ll discover that your trainee has often realized his mistake without you having to point it out.
For your example, if your trainee has chosen an IV catheter far too large for the vein he’s identified, you might want to intervene, and have him choose a smaller catheter rather than risk a blown IV and sticking the patient again unnecessarily.
On the other hand, if his venipuncture technique is sound, but you notice that he has placed all of his supplies on his non-dominant side, or out of reach…
… it might be a more valuable lesson to let him futilely try to occlude the vein while he scrambles to hook up the line. Nothing like a good blood stain on your pants leg to teach you to lay out everything within easy reach, is there?
And afterward, while your trainee is changing into a clean uniform, you can smile tolerantly and ask, “So what would you have done differently?” You might even make it another teachable moment, and tell him how to use peroxide and elbow grease to get those blood stains out of his pants.
It’s orientation, not indoctrination.
Part of your job as a preceptor is to familiarize your trainee with your agency’s organizational culture. Every agency has its own way of doing things, and there’s nothing wrong with that. As a preceptor, no doubt you have your own personal style, too.
But just because your trainee does things differently, doesn’t mean they’re wrong. Keep an open mind, and your trainee just may show you a better way of doing things. You’re trying to create a competent practitioner, not a clone of yourself.
Culture constantly evolves, and organizational culture is no exception. The day an agency, no matter how great, refuses to accept outside influence, is the day that agency starts the downhill slide toward mediocrity. As a preceptor, your responsibility to the agency is to consider whether your trainee’s method might have merit, and make suggestions to management accordingly.
If such suggestions are unwelcome, then you’re not orienting, you’re indoctrinating. Cults indoctrinate people, and they do not tolerate independent thought.
As a teacher, a mentor, and a steward of your profession, do you want a cult of protocol monkeys, or would you rather have thinking medics?
Your choice.
A little over a week ago, a unique cross-Atlantic EMS cultural exchange between paramedics Justin Schorr and Mark Glencorse and paramedic/documentary filmmaker Ted Setla, celebrated its first anniversary.
Chronicles of EMS, now known as Beyond the Lights and Sirens, captured the interest and imagination of the EMS blogosphere, and showcased the power of social media as a source for change in EMS.
It spawned A Seat at the Table, a series of round-table discussions among industry leaders about the future of EMS, that continues to this day.
It inspired similar cultural exchanges, like the Mutual Aid series by Los Angeles paramedic student Jeremiah Bush and my fellow Louisianian, Natalie Quebedeaux.
And last week, Natalie and I had the opportunity to add another chapter to the Chronicles story, when we hosted Hamburg, Germany paramedic Niels Petersen to a week in Cajun country.
Niels got a taste of Louisiana-style EMS with me at The Borg, and Natalie gave him a tour of her employer’s operation as well, an experience she’ll hopefully share on a future episode of Mutual Aid.
We ran a few calls, made a few hundred post changes, delivered one baby, and explained to a lot of little old Cajun ladies just who was the man with the different uniform and the funny accent.
Funny thing is, he speaks better English than most of the patients we encountered.
We also introduced Niels to Cajun food, a cuisine not as alien to him as it might seem, since Cajun cooking has a pretty strong German influence. We listened to a live Cajun band at DI’s Cajun Restaurant, and had raw oysters, fried alligator, gumbo, crawfish étouffée, devils on horseback, boudin and andouille, Natchitoches meat pies, crawfish pistolettes, and of course, boiled crawfish spicy enough it made your nose run, just like it oughta.
It took him a while to get the hang of it, but before long he was pinchin’ tails and suckin’ heads like a native.
Even better, despite my weakness for Cajun food, I was able to maintain my weight loss (17 pounds since February 1, w00t!) regimen.
Of course, no visit to my home would be complete without a trip to the range. Niels is a new shooter, but we rectified that by shooting a sizable portion of the Ambulance Driver arsenal. After running a few mags through my 1911′s and my AR15, he declared his love for all things redneck, and announced his intention to invade France.
Those crazy Germans. They just can’t help it, the poor dears.
From the looks of things, he enjoyed his trip:
We hope to add another chapter to the story in spring or summer of 2012, when I travel to Hamburg to experience first-hand the German EMS system.
Time to update the Blogroll O’ Doom here at Ambulance Driver World Headquarters, home of the most hated blog name in the EMS blogsophere!
First, welcome ParaPup to the JEMS Fire/EMS Blogs team, and read her post on sexism in EMS.
Next come a few more female EMTs to add to the Bloggers I’ve Met roll; Inspiratory Drive at Cheyne Stokes Inspirations rocks the ‘bolance in Joisey, and Christie at Push To Shock is a fellow Borg drone down there in the Golden Triangle. Stop by and give ‘em some comment love!
I had a chance to meet the lovely lady who writes Just My Blog at EMS Expo in Dallas. She and her husband live in the frozen north of Canada, where I devoutly hope she will take me bear hunting in return for some blog love.
There are others too numerous to mention in one blog post, so check out the Blogroll O’ Doom for the new additions!
As always, I run a reciprocal blogroll. If you have me linked, but don’t see your blog listed here, drop me a line and I’ll add you.
This story has been circulating around the various EMS forums over the past 24 hours:
A veteran firefighter refused to respond to last month’s deadly shooting spree that left Rep. Gabrielle Giffords wounded because he had different political views than his colleagues and “did not want to be part of it,” according to internal city memos.
Some posters in EMS forums are wondering if this firefighter’s refusal to respond detracted in any way from the heroism of those that did. I have only two things to say to that:
1. The firefighters and paramedics who responded to that scene were not heroic. They provided medical care under difficult and chaotic circumstances… just as they are expected to do. It’s our freakin’ job. Doing it well does not make you a hero, nor does dying in the line of duty. Every cop, fireman and EMT takes a calculated risk every day when they put on a uniform. Sometimes the unexpected happens, or the calculation proved incorrect. Sometimes the buildings collapse on you, or the drunk driver plows you over while you’re working the accident scene, or the intruder you didn’t see manages to shoot you where your vest offers no protection…
… but these things happen, and we know and accept it.
When we bandy about words like heroism so freely, it cheapens the meaning of the word. I’m not a hero, and it would shame me to be called so while in the company of men who are.
2. You don’t get to choose your patients. You may not like them, you may not approve of their lifestyle choices, you may resent being the taxpayer saddled with the bill of their system abuse, and you may disagree with their political philosophy…
… but when the alarm goes off, you answer the fucking call.
And you render the same quality of care, be they crack dealer or Congressman, skell or socialite. We as a profession are accorded a sacred trust by our patients, and foremost in keeping that trust is the implicit understanding that you answer the call when it comes in, without hesitation or mental reservations.
If you can’t do that, then get out.
The only good thing that can be said of Mark Ekstrum here is that he realized that, and chose to retire before his department decided on how to discipline him.
… Episode 35 is up at Confessions of an EMS Newbie.
Ron and I wax philosophic about Trauma Center designations, the proliferation of Weapons of Mass Distraction* since 9/11, and we even say good things about air medical transport.
It’s Confessions of an EMS Newbie, the only podcast proven to reverse the terminal boredom induced by ICS 100-800!
* The rash of card courses that popped up to take advantage of DHS grant money intended to make us all Sooper Dooper Hazmat Confined Space Burn Trauma Biological Weapon Awareness Technicians, while we still have major cities with EMS systems who don’t have 12-lead capability, or medics who can manage an airway.
Updated: CBS pulled the youTube video, but you can still see it here.
Some people are speculating that she suffered a stroke on-air. Since the symptoms were transient, I’d be more likely to call it a TIA, or perhaps some type of seizure.
The story says a coworker drove her home as a precautionary measure after paramedics on scene checked her out.
The proper precautionary measure would have been a safe, comfortable BLS ambulance ride to the Emergency Department for a CT scan and a neurological workup. Whoever the medic was that let her refuse transport, I can only hope he tried hard to convince her to go, and documented accordingly.
Update 2-18-2011: Doctors and patient are saying it was a complex migraine. And while it wasn’t a stroke, it still doesn’t rule out a TIA. Early CT scans of acute ischemic stroke are essentially normal, and especially so with the transient symptoms of a TIA. Without more sophisticated imaging than a CT scan (the report only says she had “blood tests and a brain scan”), there’s no way to definitively say it wasn’t a TIA.
I’m happy Serene Branson’s symptoms weren’t a harbinger of a more serious condition, but I must stress: If you or a loved one ever experience such symptoms, seek medical care immediately. Call 911.
My brother-from-another-mother Gary Saffer and I do an EMS lecture called “Deconstructing EMS: Everything We Know Is Wrong,” in which we challenge some of the long held assumptions about Emergency Medical Services. Most of these assumptions have no basis in fact and indeed, most are disproven by scientific research.
During the Epic Hog Hunt of 2010, Alan, Matt G., Daniel, TOTWTYTR and I had a lively discussion centered on the theme that most conventional wisdom is ill-informed, if not downright incorrect, and how most people hate to have their assumptions challenged.
Medical professionals are not immune to the phenomenon. Some of our practices in EMS are accepted by our peers as articles of faith, even when very little evidence supports it, and a growing mountain of scientific study disproves it.
Like the idea that paramedics save lives.
Or spinal immobilization is proven beneficial.
Or helicopters are the ultimate means of EMS transport.
Or that supplemental oxygen might actually be harmful for some people.
Or that endotracheal intubation is the Gold Standard of airway management.
Or that recently deceased people need chest compressions and breathing to be successfully resuscitated.
That last one confounds me no end. I have plenty of colleagues in EMS that steadfastly refuse to accept the fact that artificial ventilation in cardiac arrest does not improve outcomes, it in fact worsens them. Yet still they rationalize all sorts of reasons to keep stopping chest compressions to breathe for the patient, or invent excuses to intubate a patient based on little more than habit and organizational inertia.
This is not some wild idea masquerading as fact, this is proven science. What we were taught 10 and 15 years ago was the wild idea masquerading as fact.
In the past 3 years, I’ve had more successful resuscitations (people who walked out of the hospital alive) than I’ve had in the 14 previous, once I accepted the fact that a) breathing ain’t all that important once you’re dead, and b) we only take an arrest victim to the hospital if they’re no longer in arrest. And the research supports my n=1 experential anecdote.
If you still doubt that artificial ventilation in cardiac arrest is unnecessary, or if the stultifyingly boring video in CPR class left you snoring gently before you could absorb that lesson, I have it in layman’s terms for you on Alan’s blog.
You’re welcome.
For my readers who shoot God’s Own Caliber, .45 ACP:
FEDERAL and AMERICAN EAGLE
45 AUTO PRODUCT SAFETY WARNING
Immediate Action Required
Certain lots of recently manufactured 45 Auto ammunition may contain an incorrect propellant charge. Use of product from these lots may result in firearm damage and possible serious injury.
DO NOT USE PRODUCT FROM THE FOLLOWING LOTS:
If you have in your possession any 45 Auto with the following brand names and part numbers, check to see if your ammunition package contains the above lots:
* American Eagle®(AE45A, AE45N1, or AE45A250)
* Champion™ (WM5233), GoldMedal®(GM45B)
* Hi-Shok ®(45C, 45D)
* Federal® Personal Defense ®(C45C, C45D)Example below:
THIS WARNING APPLIES ONLY TO THE LOTS LISTED ABOVE.If you possess ammunition from any of these lots, or have questions concerning this warning, please contact us at 1-800-831-0850 or 1-800-322-2342 and ask for Product Service. Federal will provide replacement product and will cover the cost of returning the affected product.
We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause.
It’d be a damned shame if your Glock 30, Springfield XDM .45, or God forbid, a 1911 (*horrors!*) went kaboom because of defective ammo. Make sure yours isn’t among the recalled lots!
Unlike most EMS providers who respond to pagers and quick-call systems, Dr. House would be tracked down by his boss to inform him of an interesting call. For the most part, he would handle all of the critical cases. That is unless he gets in trouble. In that case, he would be assigned dialysis transfer duty for a duration decided by his boss.
He’d also have his “team” do an 18 lead EKG, CBG, cranial nerve exam, orthostatic vitals, spO2, rectal temperature, etCO2, NEXUS exam, MEND exam, field sobriety test, Cosmopolitan Magazine Couples Compatibility Test, paralysis and Train of Four monitoring, atropine and adenosine tolerance tests, a brief trial of transcutaneous pacing, check for rectal tone, sweep for priapism, internal vaginal exam, Mallampati scoring, a FAST exam, a polygraph, Rorschach and thematic apperception testing, and i-STAT point of care lab testing…
… for every single patient, regardless of complaint.
Because as anyone who has ever watched House, MD knows, his diagnostic method is throwing shit against the wall to see what sticks.
Because, you know, all patients lie. Sure, he says he has a stubbed toe, but it’s most likely a new airborne strain of Ebola.
… Episode 34 is up on Confessions of an EMS Newbie.
In the midst of a blizzard*, Ron and I discuss what makes a good medic, firearms fallacies found in EMS textbooks, and the science of wound ballistics.
It’s Confessions of an EMS Newbie, and the title of this episode is “Blunt and Penetrating.”
Heh, that’s us all right.
*Blizzard, Southern definition: Any 24 hour span where the ambient temperature drops below 40 degrees.
A recent conversation with a friend:
Good Lawyer*: “Say, was I ever as sparky and idealistic as the EMS Newbie?”
Ambulance Driver: “Well, law school made you cynical before you were ever an EMT. But yeah, you were pretty damned sparky.”
GL: “Come on, really?”
AD: “Dude. Coyote Ugly, in Austin about six years ago. Remember the chick dancing on the bar with her boobs hanging out?”
GL: “Vaguely. You’re talking about the high chick?”
AD: “There we were, ogling a reasonably attractive, semi-clothed female dancing on the bar, with her rack exposed. And she’s already trumpeted the Texas Girl Mating Call, ‘I am druuuuunk, y’all!’ Remember what you said?”
GL: “Uummm…”
AD: “You said, ‘Did you get a look at her pupils? That chick’s high as a kite.’ Heck, at that point, I hadn’t even noticed that she had eyes, much less the size of her pupils.”
GL (defensively): “Well, you shoulda seen ‘em! Her pupils were huge.”
AD: “I wish to revise my statement. I didn’t mean you were sparky. You still are. Sparky McSparklemedic, that’s you.”
*So named because he’s a paramedic, too.
You know, the one they just voluntarily relocated to, because it offered better opportunities than the place they just left.
New Hampshire has a similar problem with transplants from their sophisticated, more enlightened border state. They call them “Massholes.”
First, gather all your ingredients: alcohol, one common redneck with previous DUI convictions, a minor stepchild he is responsible for, an equally soused brother-in-law, and just a smidgen of personal responsibility.
And I do mean smidgen. Just the barest fucking pinch of doing the right thing, so that only the most sensitive of palates would notice the presence of that particular ingredient.
Next, set your minor stepchild aside, and mix all other ingredients in a Super Bowl (party). Let soak until both adults are suitably pickled. Add in the minor stepchild.
Filter ingredients through a strainer until all of the personal responsibility is removed. Leave these at the party. Pour all remaining ingredients into a car. Roll into a ball of shattered glass and twisted metal.
Flee the scene, and leave your minor stepchild and brother-in-law cooling in the wreck.
You better hope the sheriff’s deputies find you before your wife does, you cowardly, loathsome bastard. I think she’s got “till death do us part” on her mind.
Brian Kellett, aka Tom Reynolds of Random Acts of Reality, is hanging it up.
Tom’s blog was one of the first EMS blogs on the internet, one of the first widely-read blogs in England, and both of his books grace my library. I’m sad to see him go.
Luckily, he’s got archives. Go browse them and wish him a fond farewell.
… the Bob Page interview is up at Confessions of an EMS Newbie.
Bob is one of the most talented and dynamic EMS educators out there. You should give it a listen.

























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